Latest Reads

"Chasing the Dragon" was Jackie Pullinger's tale of ministering in HongKong's walled city - amidst the depths of drugs, gangs, crime, and prositution. Her story was a story of faith - her call as a college student, and her simple obediance to go to HongKong. The greatest thing that struck me about Jackie's story was the mighty power of the Holy Spirit demonstrated through her life of weakness among the oppressed. She didnt have an organized "ministry," rather she stayed up all night to walk the slimy streets of the walled city, finding her way in brothels and drug dens to speak the truth of the gospel. She saw converts delivered from heroin addictions by the power of the Spirit, painlessly as they spoke in tongues. Her stories were full of life, trust, faith, and continuous dialogue with Jesus that served as her LIGHT in the darkness.

"Pedagogy of the Oppressed" was Paulo Freire's insight into work among the poor. Although I wholeheartedly agreed with his analysis of the poor's identity crisis and struggles, I found his solutions godless and lacking. Poverty is indeed, at its core - an identity crisis. It restrains an individual under systems of oppression that leave them questioning who they are, and if they can ever change! His solutions were written from a humanistic perspective so I didn't agree with his theory that we could lead the poor to simply "discover their potential to change" by dialogue. The truth is, the only message of hope we can bring to the poor is about a God who loves them, entered into their pain, overcame it, and therefore can also enter their hearts and transform them by the Holy Spirit.

"The New Friars" was a very inspiring compilation of stories and journal entries of people like me, who want to find solidarity among the poor for Jesus. The author pieced together snippets of experiences and struggles throughout history for the cause of the poor - to introduce the latest surge of twenty somethings committed to serving the oppressed. He coined the term "New Friars" for these individuals, who are radically living on the fringes in the inspiration of Christ Himself, Mother Theresa, John the Baptist, St. Francis, St. Clare, Shane Claiborne, Chris Heurtz, and the like... I was suprised to find WordMadeFlesh mentioned in this hall of fame, as well as a place for the 24/7 prayer movement, and also those who have made Nazarite vows. These journeys seemed like reading a chapter of my own journal from the past two years, it reminded me I am not alone.

"Rees Howells - Intercessor" by Norman Grubb is a powerful account of the life of a Welsh coal miner who was used by God to change the course of history merely by prayer. It has challenged me to not pray for anything I can become the flesh and blood answer to. It has reminded me that we MUST be heavenly minded to be of any earthly good. I am only a few chapters into this one, and I'll be taking it on the plane to Nepal this weekend.

ExodusCry

Check out http://www.exoduscry.com/
I wholeheartedly endorse and support this amazing community and their stand against the trade. I've gotten a chance to speak and pray alongside Benji here in KansasCity, even for Cambodia. The thing that struck me most about this man's message is that he said a person's contribution to end the trade begins FIRST in personal purity. Yes, I agree. What we stand for in the secret place pushes back the tide of darkness over the earth. And then I would say the second way we wage war, is in prayer...

I remember one point in Cambodia thinking to myself, "I could sit by the ocean and just cry... forever... about everything I've seen. And it just wouldn't be enough. No, I could cry a day, a week, and... as long as a hundred years, and it wouldn't express sorrow to equate the atrocities..." God has long since placed His healing hand on my heart and allowed me to leave the burden of my sorrow on the cross, but in its place remains a immovable cry for justice. I want to BE that prayer!

Simplicity

Lately I find myself inspired by Rich Mullins, and a few saints of old like St. Francis of Assissi and St. Clare.

Rich Mullins could have lived quite comfortably considering how well loved his music was - but he took a vow of poverty which limited his living resources and made the rest available as margin for extravegent giving. The later end of his short life was spent teaching music to children on an Indian reservation while Rich lived on a small church salary.





St. Francis was born into wealth and plumbed the depths of current pleasures and entertainments to discover he was having a spiritual crisis in his early twenties... upon encountering a beggar in the market, he ran after him and gave the poor man everything in his pocket... and eventually his pilgrimage for meaning led him to receive a call from the Lord to "rebuild His church." Thus he spent his life in service to the oppressed, in poverty for solidarity among them, and preaching the truth.

I've been thinking about saints like these, and thinking about some of the things I've been reading in the sermon on the mt. I've come to the conclusion that I want to be radical, and not just on the fringes of some meaningful bandwagon. I want to truly understand and embody the kingdom of Jesus. I've living for the greatest love in the world - His name is Jesus - and the greatest revolution about the take place - His return as King. So Im putting all my stock into the age to come... and I've committed to live simply, and learn what that means.

I wouldnt call it a vow of poverty, because I think some of the saints of old got it wrong, thinking God likes poverty just because Jesus was born in a stable for solidarity. I think God was more making the statement that He isnt too proud, in His love, to be one of us, even one of us poor. God has a very very special care for the poor, and He values their faith, but it seems to me that poverty isnt His design. I had a friend a few years back who would eat out of trashcans. Not that he had too, but because he though it meant he trusted God more, or was more special to God or something. Somehow I dont buy that. In light of the Kingdom coming, and in light of the oppression I saw poverty brought in Cambodia - I cant act as though poverty is ok in God's kingdom. My vow of simplicity is simply an agreement with God that Im living for the kingdom coming, not the present age; and in practical terms that just determines what I'll do with what I make with my hands. (But also in light of the sermon on the mt. Im learning that giving stuff is supposed to be secret) Ive committed to simplicity so I'll be able to stand amidst the economic pressures coming before Christ's return, and for solidarity with the oppressed so I can tell them the truth in love. Its also selfish in part, because I want the benefits of giving and the freedom to trust God, jump on a train anywhere, and not be concerned that there wont be enough, or whose going to take care of my stuff... I know this will be a journey of grace, and I can garuntee Im going to mess up, I already have made plenty of mistakes spending too much or not saving at times I should have. But I really want to learn to honor God with what I have, even if it takes a long time of learning!

Seems like right around new years there was a clear line in the sand drawn for me, and God offered me a strange, free, life on His terms - or to continue the wider path i was aimlessly trying to find my way on. Of course I went with Him, and I feel more and more relieved each time He lets me in on what this is going to really look like.

Blessed are those who stand in the House of the Lord by Night

Being at the House of Prayer, I am doing the "nite watch" which is the hours the nite staff and musicians pray late hours. So when this side of the globe is sleeping I am standing, saying,

"Cast out all darkness, come, fill me with your Light."

Forerunner

Forerunner: 1: one that precedes and indicates the approach of another

Herald: one that proclaims or announces the coming or arrival of a notable event

Messanger: 1: one who bears a message or does an errand: as aarchaic : forerunner, herald

I went to OneThing conference in KansasCity and the Lord blew me away - He had told me to get ready and go to the House of Prayer to hear about my calling...! I expected some more direction but I wasnt thinking big enough!

The theme of the conference was about end times and I was soberly struck with the reality of Christ's soon return. God heavily began to lay on my heart the desire to be ready, and to lead others in readiness. After internship in Cambodia, I have seen how dark the darkness can get - and knowing this will only escelate on a global level is sobering. Yet this creates a deep longing in my heart for Jesus to return as King - bringing justice and true peace through His kingdom. If I had not gone to Cambodia and see how corrupt the earth can become apart from the Light of Jesus - I perhaps wouldn't have felt this urgency, this genuine longing for Christ's kingdom. I think I would have just been swept along with the comforts of Western society, figuring "one day" this earth would come to the end of her season and the new age begin. No, friends, we are at the end of the age... I am confident the next few decades will escelate and reveal the darkness, which will stand in contrast as the true church arises in purity and community - amidst a great falling away.

God revealed my call through this, as a forerunner for the coming King. It means a consecreation... as one who is committed to prophetically live for the coming kingdom by the sermon on the mount, in community pursuing a life of prayer and the fasting, the 24/7 prayer movement, speaking boldly the truth, and doing justice for the oppressed. I took this as a sacred commitment before God and thousands of people to step into this for a lifetime. This was not just a "new years solution" kind of thing. I made lifestyle commitments that I will keep until the day I die, in His grace. I feel relief so emmense, peace so great, in my soul - because Ive stepped into what I was made for. I feel purpose - knowing I have finally heard from God exactly why I was born in these times.

The greatest revolution in human history is about to take place, as the King of Kings is about to come back to earth and wipe evil off the planet and take the throne! Yet He will not come until His Bride is in agreement with Him, asking Him to come and reign - may my life be a burning and shining lamp to proclaim His coming!

Along the lines of consecration, Lou Engle spoke about Nazarites, in our modern day and age. (A Nazarite in the Old Testament was someone who took vows of sacrifice before God, to be set apart for Him. Traditionally they did not cut their hair or drink alcohol.) I was consecrated as a Nazarite. I have set some radical lifestyle shifts so that every day I will remember I am not living for the present and that I am chosen by God, in His grace. (no im still cutting my hair, im not about to get dreads. The commitments I made were to give up meat, alcohol, sweets, and coffee, and I took a vow of simplicity financially) I've given up some of the permissible pleasures of this life as a daily reminder that Im living for the kingdom coming and not the present reality. I want to cut off the margin of my life so I can blaze hard down this forerunner trail!

Most of all, God wants my heart, my whole heart. He loves me, He wants me, I am His. I want to behold His beauty and hear His voice forever! Come Lord JESUS!